Today on A Free Man: More country than punk

Well, things that seem too good to be true generally are and so it was with freecycling. There is always a catch and the freecycling catch is that yesterday afternoon I found myself immersed in freegan melodrama.

It all revolved around the dog crate – the container we used for Timmins’ trip to the UK. From work, I sent an e-mail around to the legion of people that were after the crate saying that after 2:00 the first person who turned up would be the proud owner of a dog crate. I planned to talk to Dr. O’C a little later and explain the deal to her in case someone showed up slightly early. Well, almost instantaneously – and certainly before I had a chance to call home – the first person came and took the crate away. A little cheeky, but fine. Done.

Not so much. Then, and still well before the 2:00 start time, Dr. O’C got a call from a frantic gentleman who wanted the crate because his dog was flying to Hong Kong tomorrow. Due to some kind of complication, his god shipping crate had fallen through. She, wisely, passed him on to me. I feel the guy’s pain, because dog shipping is fraught with problems – first hand experience. Here is our textual conversation as the day progressed.

Freek: Hello, please can I have your dog cage? (Yes, he said cage.)

AFM: I’m sorry, the crate has been taken.

[Slightly later]Freek: Hi, I need to send my dog to hong kong tomorrow. I order a cage on line they told me they have got this size in stock. I cant do anything now. Do you think i can have your cage? thanks

AFM: I’m really sorry, but the crate has been taken.

Freek: Please let me know whether i can have the cage. I can’t do anything when airline told me they dont have that size box last mins

AFM: (Trying a different tack) A man has come and taken away the crate. I’m sorry.

Freek: OK i don’t mind pay for it.

AFM: (Maybe if I use his language?). I do not have a cage for your dog. A man has taken the cage. The cage now belongs to the man.

Freek: Can i have his number? My dog need to fly tomorrow.

At which point my patience was spent and I decided to leave it – just ignore the man. Seeing the humor in the situation. I shared this exchange with Dr. O’C, a huge fan of other people’s melodrama, and she reminded me how much of a pain in the ass it was to get our dog from the U.S. to Britain. Everything went wrong. Ultimately, I had to fly on short notice from London back to St. Louis, drive to Columbia, pick up the damned dog, drive to Chicago and put him on the plane. I turned up to O’Hare with the wrong size cage, err crate, for my dog and had to buy one with less than an hour to go before the deadline. It was a nightmare.

If you know me, I’m not the kind of person who likes to get up in other people’s business. I prefer to live and let live and my original inclination had been to do just that. But now guilt, that great motivator started to creep into my head. So, against my better judgment, I called the original dog crate freek – the early bird who had taken the cage. I had to call him a couple of times to get through. I explained to him the quandary in which the Hong Kong dog cage freek found himself. I related my experience with transcontinental dog moving – how hard it can be. I told him that Hong Kong Dog Cage Freek would pay for the crate.

He was unswayed, “Well, I’m sorry but I got the crate for my friend. He has a wolf and he’s having some, err, problems. He really needs the crate.”

As much as I wanted to know the answer to a few questions (What kind of problems? What is he going to do with the crate? How the fuck do you get a wolf in southern England?) I just had to leave it there.

Freecycling – a gateway into other folks’ dramas.

Radiohead’s “Hail to the Thief” is available from Amazon.

 
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