Come On America!

8:11 a.m. Wednesday – Adelaide

Because I’m 15 1/2 hours in the future I already know who won the U.S. election. But to avoid ruining your election night teevee watching, I’ll keep quiet. But you might want to spend some time in the barrrrrrr tonight.

I thought I might try my hand at some live blogging today, since I spend my work day in front of a computer anyway and chances are I’m not going to get much done as I obsess over the returns.

8:20 a.m.: Turnout is key to an Obama win and most news agencies are predicting record voter turnout. I’m particularly interested in three states, largely because I used to live in them: Florida, Georgia and Missouri.  The Melbourne Herald Sun tells me that problems were “minor” in Florida. Why don’t we just wait and see about that, they haven’t started counting yet.

8:45 a.m.: Fox has a voter fraud hotline! I wouldn’t encourage vandalism, but if one were to send an e-mail to voterfraud@foxnews.com and claim that Rudy Giuliani physically prevented them from voting, for example, it would be mildly amusing. If 1,000,000 people did it, I’m pretty sure Rupert Murdoch would explode. I’ve added some election night music below – Ani DiFranco and Jake Shimabukuro.

9:12 a.m.: Surprise, surprise – MSNBC streams to our socialist isle in the southern hemisphere. Anyone want to bet that Matthews and Olbermann come to blows by the end of the night? Oh, god, they’re talking about exit polls. Do you people never learn? Stupid liberal media.

9:38 a.m.: Chris Matthews is a tosser. Rambling about South Africa, patriotism, a new dawn. Shut up and give me some early results. Indiana’s closed, so is New Hampshire. Can’t wait for NPR’s coverage at 10:30. I wish Chuck Todd would shave.

10:01 a.m.: First numbers in, woo hoo! McCain ahead in Kentucky and Obama in Indiana with 0.034% of the vote in.  Bob Barr currently has 0 votes.

10:22 a.m.: Oooh, exit polls from Slate:

Ohio: Obama +8
New Mexico: Obama +9
Virginia: Obama +9
Pennsylvania: Obama +15
Missouri: Obama +7
Florida: Obama +4

Remember 2004 and President Kerry…

10:30a.m.: Thank GOD for NPR. No more yammering morons. Obama is surprisingly close in KY with 10% in, mostly from the “real Kentucky”.  But Michelle just told me that NPR’s calling it for McCain and Vermont for Obama. McCain leading 8 – 3.

10:49 a.m.: First results from Florida. John McCain is president of Lake County. Haven’t you people learned anything in the last eight years? Don’t force me to extend Florida Hate Week!

11:02 a.m.: Stupid work. Stupid meeting. I’ll be back in a bit. Lafayette Co. in FL voted 80% McCain. But then, it is the scrotum of Florida. By the time this meeting is over, I’m expecting Florida to shape the hell up and I’m watching you too, Georgia!

11:54 a.m.: Australian bosses clearly don’t understand the U.S. election is far more important than a rambling meeting about mice. CNN (in the tank) has Obama up 77 – 34. NPR has called Pennslyvania and has Obama 101 – 34. Could be a short night if the liberal communist media has its way.

11:57 a.m.: Headed to my University office where I will shut the door and turn out the lights to keep out pesky students.

 

 Ani DiFranco - "This Land Is Your Land" [3:06m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

 

 Jake Shimabukuro - "Stars and Stripes Forever" [2:28m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

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