I’ve got a fair few pet peeves. In fact, the number of things that irritate the hell out of me seems to be increasing with my age. I guess I’m on that inevitable march to grumpy-old-manhood. One of the biggies for me is intentional misspelling. You know what I mean – ‘boyz’ for ‘boys’, ‘tonite’ for ‘tonight’, ‘xtreme’ for ‘extreme’*. Lolcats. (God, I hate lolcats). I just don’t see the point – are you trying to be urban or cute or kewl or just intentially moronic? It’s an epidemic.
Well, Boy Z’s day care has just changed ownership and the new owners have renamed the place. In the interest of privacy and security and the like, I won’t disclose the whole name but it involves ‘Kidz’. Is my kid joining a gang? The Happy Valley Boyz? Come on. It’s a day care center. I mean, it isn’t a primary school, but presumably they have some minor responsibility in early childhood education.
I’m a letter writer. When something gets stuck in my craw, I try to let the guilty party know about it. And a lot of the time, my letters get results. A letter to the editor of my hometown paper got me two summers of work as an intern reporter. Letters to congressmen and Senators have gotten me out of tax problems and problems with my student loans and an expedited passport. So rather than ranting for the evening at Dr. O’C, I put pen to paper:
Dear Proprietors of [Boy Z's Day Care Center],
I am writing in regards to your recent name change. I feel that it is a very poor example to use an intentional misspelling in the name of a day care center**. Presumably you, like myself, are dedicated to the learning growth and development of the children in your care. To that end, I would prefer that my son be exposed to proper use of the English language as much as possible. ‘Kidz’ is neither cute nor clever. It looks shoddy, lazy and lends an irresponsible air to the center. I would like you to strongly reconsider your decision regarding the name change.
Yours sincerely,
Dr. A Free Man (yeah, I know – lends credibility)
Isn’t Boy Z lucky to have a dad like me?
——————–
* I don’t want to hear anything about ‘Dawgs’. That’s different. Clearly.
** The perceptive among you may have noticed that I used the American spelling of ‘center’ rather than the Commonwealth. I wonder if they’ll pick that up.
——————–
I’m not sure where I got this remix of Jarvis Cocker’s “Fat Children”. But the album, “Jarvis” is great work from the former Pulp frontman. Buy it from 
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by Angel
22 Jan 2009 at 21:19
I absolutely hate that, too. I have a hard time using the abbreviated lingo in text messaging. Purposely misspelling words drives me crazy.
by headbang8
22 Jan 2009 at 21:25
And what’s up with this “Can I haz cheeseburgerz?” bullshit?
Apparently, if you use cuz, wuz, haz and u, you’re automatically a riot.
Alas, kidz in Happy Vally are likely to haz parenz, and that’s where the trouble startz.
by Rol
22 Jan 2009 at 21:30
I agree 100%… and I liked your post title as soon as I saw it in my blog list.
by Noble Savage
22 Jan 2009 at 21:54
Ugh. What is wrong with people? Glad you wrote a letter. If Boy Z is anything like I was with my letter-writing, grammar-correcting mother, he will feign embarrasment but secretly think you’re right and be proud that you’re smart enough and care enough to correct language mistakes, or at least try to. And then he will grow up to correct grammar and write letters as well. Consider it a hereditary gift.
Noble Savages last blog post..Newsmusings
by yellojkt
22 Jan 2009 at 22:14
It all started with the backwards “R” in Toyz R Us. I did my first LOLcat (actually a LOLprez) today. I hope it doesn’t piss you off.
yellojkts last blog post..My First LOLPrez
by holly*
22 Jan 2009 at 22:20
i hatez when ppl do thatz….
no really, i just cant read when people type like a 13 year old texting. no.
and Z is very lucky to have a dad like you.
holly*s last blog post..{2 out of 344}
by Erin
22 Jan 2009 at 22:20
Great post, and great letter. It is such a vaild issue. I am not sure I would have made the effort to write a letter, but I am certainly glad you did. I would likely have just complained to my hubby. Glad to see some of us are doers.
Although the whole “kidz” thing is universal, I personally stuggle with the “English” that is commonly spoken here. I can’t stand the way everything is run together. Whaddadoinwannacomoverfarbeermate? And when it isn’t run together it is shortened to something unrecognizable. When did people become so lazy? Oh and don’t get me started on “Ta”. It is “THANK YOU” people!
Keep us posted on whether you get a response and whether the new owners change the name!
Erins last blog post..On My Music Radar This Week
by Agnes
22 Jan 2009 at 22:21
YES!!!!
I bloody hate this shit too. It’s not cute, it just makes you look like a “moran” (great picture!).
And that lolcat rubbish – I would rather drive nails up my arms than look at that crap.
I don’t go to Video Ezy because if they can’t even spell their name properly, how can I expect them to do business properly? Oh, that and the fact that the girl who works there is a right moo.
Am beginning to think that I too am a lot like you. Only I’m already grumpy, and I’m not a man.
by SSG
22 Jan 2009 at 22:32
errr…. ok I think I have a different view from the rest of your commentators. Please don’t kill me. I do hate it when the street/text/lolcatz language is used in professional correspondance, business names, anything not with friends so to speak. I dislike the whoring out of the English language as much as anyone. But then English is an evolving language- why did the US change colour to color? Because it was easier to spell and they thought it more phonetically correct? Then why not let them spell it the way they like, people know what it means.
So, when someone says “kewl”, I know what they mean, and I quite like that word myself: I think it is funny in reference to the many ways you can spell the same sound in English- the “uff” sound can come from “uph, ough” and so on, “ough” can be pronounced as ow, off, uff, oh… and so on and on and on.
So when talking with friends, chatting, sending emails, sometimes (Ok, you got me, quite a lot) I use “kewl” “yous” “peeps” “ppl” and so on. It’s less formal and you can alter your tone in terms of talking like a small animal, child, pirate, gangster, or whatever persona you’re trying to put across. The only exception being I don’t use words with Z (that’s a Zed, people) because it’s American and just plain wrong. So there.
SSGs last blog post..Wednesday Wallpaper
by SSG
22 Jan 2009 at 22:33
PS Y’all, sic ‘em, DAWGS!!!!!
SSGs last blog post..Wednesday Wallpaper
by arizaphale
22 Jan 2009 at 22:37
Oh headbang! You do crack me up. I have been trying to explain the whole Happy Valley thing to AFM….perhaps this incident will illustrate my concerns.
Intentional misspellings are about as clever and funny as those dicky, personalised car number plates that say DAVO or SEXY1 or SHAZZA18 or MY EH (for Holdens only).
arizaphales last blog post..I am Nothing If Not Helpful
by Siren
22 Jan 2009 at 22:51
I actually got an e-mail from a co-worker with LMK in it, i had to e-mail her back just to find out what LMK meant. I dont mind what people do or say in a social setting, i am not perfect, but when it comes to schools, daycare centers, business spelling things the right way should be a MUST. Glad you wrote the letter.
Sirens last blog post..
by headbang8
22 Jan 2009 at 22:59
@ Arizaphale. I love it when you say “dicky”!
@SSG. Actually, I’m with you on this one, for the most part.
Interesting, the example of colo(u)r. The way we pronounce the word changes, and only in English do we fail to keep up with it in spelling.
Three words borrowed from the French:
Color, contour, velour.
Color was borrowed first. Emphasis swtched from second to first syllable. Americans adjust spelling to make the second syllable look more like a schwa.
Contour second. In many cases, Americans have switched the emphasis to the first syllable, but spelling hasn’t caught up.
Velour third. A comparatively recent borrowing. Both pronounced and spelled in the French manner.
Fossilizing out of date speech patterns in spelling is dumb. Or dumm.
@AFM. By the way, is this change of management the result of the ABC Learning Centres’ debacle?
by Prefers Her Fantasy Life
22 Jan 2009 at 23:46
Yes, I agree that anything associated with education should use the correct spelling.
But…
The linguist in me would like to give folks a friendly reminder that language usage and spelling are a living, growing thing. And if I were clever enough I could switch to Middle English here. But I’m not. So I won’t. Plus I haven’t had my coffee yet.
by Andrew
22 Jan 2009 at 23:52
Thank God someone else hates lolcats as much as I do! Those things are creepy.
Andrews last blog post..Laziness comes so easily to me
by Father Muskrat
23 Jan 2009 at 00:24
I despise intentionally misspelled words. I think they’re in the feezing parts of Hell near those who have committed crimes of reason. I also hate “text speak” and refuse to use it. I will use some shorthand from time to time, however.
This post reminds me of the film “Pursuit of Happyness.” The title reflected the mispelled word from the protaganist’s son’s daycare center. He tried to point it out to them, too, but they ignored him.
Father Muskrats last blog post..through a toddler’s lens
by lora
23 Jan 2009 at 01:04
that kills me too. Here in my little urban town that’s almost all you see. The other think that really pisses me off is when the daycare signs are drawn to look as though a child wrote it in crayon and the S’s are backwards.
Is that even a common problem with children? I remember having a hard time with d’s and b’s and remembering whether it was an n or an m with two humps, but never ever do I remember backwards S’s
Also, thanks for your comment. I know my opinions are out there, and also a bit judgemental and prejudice, but they are only opinions and I never treat people differently just because they have differing political views than I do. I’ll just generalize and talk about them behind their backs. Totally different.
Right?
loras last blog post..the last of the manifestos, I promise.
by Teri
23 Jan 2009 at 01:23
Good for you! The fact that a daycare used an intentional misspelling is just irritating. I, for one, am a naturally terrible speller. But I certainly TRY to spell correctly when possible. And I don’t misspell to be cute. I agree with the sentiments of your letter. Hopefully they will change the name.
Teris last blog post..Presidential Bliss
by Damon
23 Jan 2009 at 01:33
For the record, my list of pet peeves has increased as I have grown older. What or who is “lolcats?” I don’t see any problem attempting to hold the line against the disintegration of the English language. Keep up the good work.
Damons last blog post..76 Little Known Facts about Me
by SSG
23 Jan 2009 at 02:51
@ headbang, thanks, and you’re never dum!
in lolcats, for Damon:
THX HEADBANG, URE NEVR DUMB
lolcats translator here
on their page it has a cat saying
“im in da sistam, improovin ur tranlashun”
= I’m in the system, improving your translation
‘cos cats don’t understand things. see icanhazcheezburger which actually is quite funny. Sometimes.
SSGs last blog post..Wednesday Wallpaper
by courtney
23 Jan 2009 at 03:38
I hate misspellings everywhere, especially intentional ones. I won’t be surprised if today’s kids grow up to spell things with extraneous Zs all over the place.
Lolcats are stupid. So are “dawgs.” Just sayin’.
I hope your letter works.
by Jamie
23 Jan 2009 at 03:40
A friend of mine once taught at a shithole of a “university” – Oklahoma Panhandle University, if you can imagine something so horrible. Anyway, to distinguish their campus from being mistaken for a high school, they decided to put up a big sign on the main road running through town with their name and the school slogan: Oklahoma Panhandle University: Progress Thru Learning.
I kid you not.
But what shocked me most about this story was that UGA taught Chris how to spell “kids” correctly. No, he must have picked that up at Mizzou.
by Gypsy
23 Jan 2009 at 05:04
Nicely done. May they soon reconsider their kewlness.
Gypsys last blog post..Playing catch up
by Jason O.
23 Jan 2009 at 05:44
The ability to properly communicate is the foundation of any successful life and career, regardless of vocation. Well done.
Jason O.s last blog post..Taking Care of Business…
by April
23 Jan 2009 at 06:11
Hmm, I have mixed feelings about your post. In my opinion only a misanthrope could hate lolcats. I mean they’re cats and they can’t spell, what’s not to love. OK, I get it, but I still think they’re funny. I can’t help myself.
That’s probably ironic considering I hate intentional misspellings. One of my biggest pet peeves is people who give their children common names but insist on spelling them in some ridiculous way so their child will be forever correcting people. If you want your child to have an unusual name, give them an unusual name, don’t torture them and everyone else to a life of misspelling and aggravation.
I also hate the “textification” of the English language. I don’t understand words like “kewl” it’s the same number of letters as cool, so how are you saving any time or effort? I also hate it when people refuse to use proper capitalization and punctuation. That being said, if you’re actually sending someone a text message it’s fine to abbreviate things, otherwise learn to spell!
Aprils last blog post..Cold-Blah
by mickey
23 Jan 2009 at 07:16
During the inauguration, NBC was running a crawl across the screen featuring people’s text-message comments about the event. It drove me nuts! Of course I suppose it would have driven me nuts even if every word were spelled correctly. The last thing I want to see on my TV screen are the pointless random thoughts of the common man.
Oh, and for the record: Sometimes I type “gonna” instead of “going to” to sound conversational, but I think that’s a whole different thing.
mickeys last blog post..Older, not wiser
by admin
23 Jan 2009 at 07:58
Angel – I had to be really careful not to make any spelling errors in this post
Headbang – Can I Have A Cheeseburger (spelling corrected) is loathsome. Regarding Happy Valley – I don’t like it either and we’ll move as soon as financially feasible, but as I was saying to Arizaphale the other day, it’s not the worst place in the world. Not even the worst place in SA – it’s dull, but has it’s charms. I mean it’s not Hackham or Morphett Vale or Elizabeth!
Rol – Cheers.
NS – He’s got a whole slew of genetic gifts that are going to drive him batty as a teenager.
Yello – You’re probably right. That backward R has always annoyed me. I’ll let you slide on the lolcat.
by admin
23 Jan 2009 at 08:28
Holly – We’ll see how he feels in a few years. I actually write my texts properly, even though it takes ages.
Erin – You misspelled valid. I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that it was unintentional
Yeah, the Aussies sort of have their own ’special’ version of English.
Agnes – You’re far too young to be a grumpy old woman, but you could be well on your way! Video Ezy annoys me as well.
SSG – I would expect this kind of crap from you. I think you should give your degree back. Just because someone else understands you doesn’t make it acceptable to speak or write like a dipshit. I mean, I could call you THCS and you would know what I meant, but does that make it acceptable?
Oh and y’all is an acceptable contraction and I told you Dawgs was different. Clearly.
Ariza – I saw a BBOOP on a VW bug the other day.
Headbang – No, he was never at ABC. I don’t know why they’re changing owners.
Prefers – I know it’s growing and changing, but come on, we have to keep some semblance of the language of Shakespeare and Dickens and Fitzgerald.
Andrew – More just dumb than creepy. But point taken.
Father – I’m pretty sure they are going to ignore me as well.
Lora – Yeah, they’re using that kind of lettering as well, but I’m willing to let that go.
Teri – I’m pretty sure they won’t. But it may annoy or amuse them and I’ll be happy either way.
Damon – I was going to link to some lolcats, but then that would just encourage them. Looks like SSG gave you a link.
SSG – You’re a fricking lolcat.
Courtney – I’m fairly certain that it won’t. And I told you about ‘Dawgs.
Jamie – Great story. ‘Thru’ is one of the worst and most ubiquitous. Remarkably I learned to spell at our shared shitty high school. Did you join the 20th reunion committee yet? Come on, they need help planning a collective humiliation. I’m flying in from Adelaide
Gypsy – I thought you would appreciate this.
Jason – Thanks. Agreed.
April – Are you calling me a misanthrope? Wouldn’t someone who hated lolcats be a misfeline? Oh god – the name thing. Don’t get me started.
Mickey – I know. I prefer to get my pointless random thoughts of the common man on the internet.
by Dr O'C
23 Jan 2009 at 08:28
Um…I 4got 2 give them the letter when I took Boy Z to daycare this morning. Oooppsss.
by Jason
23 Jan 2009 at 08:44
Wait, do you mean to tell me that “Boy Z” is not some play on words of the more common term “boyz”? And here I thought that you came up with that name for your son as some sort of homage to Flavor Flave.
by suzer
23 Jan 2009 at 09:15
While I am just as annoyed with the mispelling of words as yourself (although adjusting to brekkie and arvo)…I do think you have to adopt the British spelling of words when you move overseas. The American spelling simplification movement didn’t have it’s roots in anything logical;)
suzers last blog post..Australian Directness, or Rudeness?
by The Unbearable Banishment
23 Jan 2009 at 10:13
You will be pegged as the problem American. At least you’ve picked a worthwhile cause.
The Unbearable Banishments last blog post..how to slowly murder your child
by SSG
23 Jan 2009 at 10:25
hahahah too funny.
I never understood why lolcats is lolcats and not lolcatz. surely.
Hahaha imagine if you had really named wee Z as “BoyZ” like “Boyz in da hood”. Imagining your face when someone thinks this of you or spells your name with a K. nice. THCS.
SSGs last blog post..Wednesday Wallpaper
by NATUI
23 Jan 2009 at 15:24
I guess I am totally out of the loop because I don’t know what the hell lolcats are even after I Googled them. Cat pictures with bad spelling? What am I missing here?
I have to say that I could never in good conscience let my child go to a school that deliberately fucked up the spelling of its name. I know this is a different situation because Boy Z is already established there, and I know if it were me I wouldn’t pull my child solely on that basis. It would, however, chap my ass to see that sign every day. It reminds me of whichever comedian made the joke: Iz not illegitimate! Of course I can read!
NATUIs last blog post..Bedtime Shenanigans
by Jamie
23 Jan 2009 at 16:26
Chris,
I was planning on attending our high school reunion, but I looked in my calendar and I had an appointment for that same day involving sitting in my garage repeatedly whacking myself in the scrotum with a ball-peen hammer. Much preferable.
by Theresa B
23 Jan 2009 at 18:14
Would you like some lite cheez with your whine?
On a similar note, I can’t send text messages because my phone doesn’t have a qwerty keyboard and I just can’t bring myself to use those abbreviations that everyone else uses.
Theresa Bs last blog post..Devaluation
by kitty
23 Jan 2009 at 22:39
1. I’m starting to suspect that you and I were seperated at birth?
2. I’m glad I’m not the only person to ask this: what the hell is lolcats? Is it some bizarre The Cure remix?
Kitty (aka GOW)
kittys last blog post..pointy things for all around the world
by Jill/Twipply Skwood
23 Jan 2009 at 23:34
Oh I HATE that! ESPECIALLY the day care centers. I work at a school, and I feel like it’s distinguished from a day care center in that the concessions to working parent are sort of minimal – we’re not full service. We’re closed on holidays and people have to find something else to do with their children. The latest you can leave your child is 5:30, and your child is more or less going to be just hanging out with the teacher and maybe one other kid from 5:00 to 5:30.
I’m saying that just to point out that’s what differentiates where I work from a daycare – we don’t do daycare. But you can still get a good, quality preschool program at a daycare center.
But I think that when they do that spelling stuff it’s like a big giant flag waiving around on top of their center – like “HEY! We’re not even going to try and educate your kid! We’re strictly daycare!” And, being a preschool teacher & all, I like to think of preschool as really very important. I’d have sure thought about switching daycare centers, though I realize it’s not as easy as all that.
That said – all’s fair in texting in lolcats. None of that bothers me a bit.
Jill/Twipply Skwoods last blog post..Oh Happy Day!
by Jud
24 Jan 2009 at 01:13
Well, sorry but you will here about ‘Dawgs’. Last time I went to a game in Athens, not only did Matthew Stafford and Knowshon Moreno make us look like chumps, somebody stole the vodka out of the cooler. I had tried to convince Wifey that if you are just looking for a busy, don’t buy Grey Goose, get a bottle of Big Joe’s Rotgut Vodka, but I digress.
War Damn Eagle
Jud
Juds last blog post..Feeling Old Today & Feeling Like the Blues
by Nathan B.
24 Jan 2009 at 01:23
AFM, you’re just old. lol.
And it’s not surprising that the guy in this post’s picture is wearing a Cardinals shirt.
by sarala
24 Jan 2009 at 02:18
I don’t mind so much the purposeful misspelling although it feels overly cute to me. Like “Ye Olde Towne Shoppe” kind of thing. I really dislike the unintentional misspellings. Like using ” ’s ” when it doesn’t belong there is a pet peeve of mine. I can’t think of an example now but it is all to frequent.
My 11 year old just started to IM me. He has learned more lolspeak in 2 weeks than I did in a year. K? He is condescending about it too. “Mom, that means OK.”
And I still insist on using capital letters and periods at the ends of sentences when I email people which is so, like, passe.
saralas last blog post..Long Day, Short Post
by mongoliangirl
24 Jan 2009 at 07:37
What peeves me more than anything is that I actually pay more attention to things when they are misspelled. Which is their point. Ugh.
And – I admit I suck at spelling. Kind of. On top of that, I’m lazy about checking my spelling. And sometimes I intentionally leave things off of the end of a word. Such as, “Sometimes I’m leavin’ something off of the end of a word which could, technically, be considered intentional misspellin’.”
Hummmmm…
mongoliangirls last blog post..Yo, Sir Mix-A-Lot! Here’s a read for ya!
by admin
24 Jan 2009 at 09:26
Jud, you misspelled ‘hear’. Typical for an Auburn fan.
by Joe
25 Jan 2009 at 15:50
This post rox. Post moar!!
Joes last blog post..Normalcy
by Nathan B.
27 Jan 2009 at 03:29
Joe, I think you meant “MOAR POAT!!11!1″
by admin
27 Jan 2009 at 08:35
Dr. O’C – Did you remember today?
Jason – Isn’t it Flava Flav?
Suzer – I mostly use the Australian/British for correspondence in Oz, but it slips my mind now and again. It’s a tough one to keep track of the longer you’re away.
TUB – I was the problem American in America.
SSG – Your mother.
NATUI – Come on, you’re an internet gal. How can you have avoided lolcats? I mean, you’re lucky if you have.
Jamie – I think you’re right. 99% of those folks I could easily do without for the rest of my days.
Theresa – I know, I try to be grammatically correct which means it takes me about half an hour to write a couple of sentences. So I just call. Or wait until I see the person.
Kitty – Cure remix – that’s good!
Jill – Great points, but I can’t help myself. You misspelled waving.
Nathan – The Cardinals thing about sums it up doesn’t it. Who you calling old?
Sarala – Capital letters and punctuation? What? thatz sooo old skool
Mongola – That is the point isn’t it? Which makes it that much more irritating.
Joe/Nathan – You’re banned.
by bluestreak
27 Jan 2009 at 21:22
I would have loved to be present when the conversation took place between the people that made the decision to spell it like that. What was the reasoning? to be more cutting edge? to appear toddler-like so parents will think the day care is cute like a baby? perhaps it was because the name with kids spelled properly was already taken?
bluestreaks last blog post..The Hyperreality of Home
by Jud
28 Jan 2009 at 01:04
Yes, I mistyped. My brain is faster than my fingers, truly.
Referring again to your original post, I once had a pet peeve, but a dawg killed it. Somewhere near Jefferson, just north of Athens. Or maybe it was Arcade, anyway, someone from UGA owes me a pet peeve.
Juds last blog post..Adventures!
by Coal Miner's Granddaughter
28 Jan 2009 at 12:42
I once called TNT. As in the Ted Turner TV channel TNT. They were airing “Underworld” and flashing up their little “Watch this next week!” and “Watch that tomorrow night!” and then, it happened.
“Your watching Underworld on TNT!”
I croaked. And called TNT. And made an ass of myself in the name of grammar.
Coal Miner’s Granddaughters last blog post..My Apologies