It is winter in Australia which means that it is football season it Australia. And by football, I don’t mean steroid stuffed giants in full body armor standing around for three plus hours, nor overpaid Brazilians kicking a round ball around for an hour and a half in the quest for a nil-nil draw. No, I’m talking about that odd game that you may have seen during a spell of insomnia that involves thirty skinny Australians occasionally kicking a rugby ball in between bouts of beating the crap out of each other.
Ah, footy. For a couple of years now, I’ve been trying to develop a passion for the game with only minimal success. Why bother, you sensibly ask? A couple of good reasons. First of all, tea time conversation topics. I work for a pretty ‘blokey’ school and was advised early on in my employment to choose a team as it would make Monday morning tea conversations flow a lot more easily.
True that. Most of the words bouncing around the walls of the tea room on Monday morning are ones like ‘Crows‘, ‘Power‘, ‘Cats‘, ‘Magpies‘, and so on. Over the last couple of years I’ve been able to learn the jargon well enough to feign interest, but I still don’t care that much about who’s atop the ladder or the weekly Crows crisis.
Secondly, and more importantly, I’m on a mission to give my kids a true blue upbringing despite being the children of immigrants. They’re boys. Aussie boys like sports. Aussie sports are cricket and footy (at least in SA and Victoria). Now we’ve got no problem with cricket, I took to cricket straightaway. It’s baseball, more or less, so no problems. (No worries.)
But this damned football, or footy as the locals call it, is just a bit too bizarre for my taste. Far too much punting. And I don’t understand why they haven’t developed the forward pass. I mean, I know Australia tends to lag a bit behind their North American and European cousins in adopting technology, but the forward pass has been around since 1906.
Whatever. We need a team. How to pick a team if you don’t really care for the game? Well, I figured it out – let the kid decide.
Now, without getting too inside footy, we’ve got a couple of AFL (major league) clubs in Adelaide – the Crows and the Power – both of whom suck. They also play in one of the worst stadiums I’ve ever seen and charge an obscene amount of money to sit in the rain and watch bad teams lose badly.
But we’ve also got the South Australian National Football League, a collection of local teams that would be kind of homologous to a AAA baseball league. They play at smaller ovals around the city, charge $10 for adults and nothing for kids and, best of all, let you go out on the pitch during the quarter breaks and kick your ball around. The latter, for a two year old, is the clincher.
A couple of weekends ago, Boy Z and I headed off to watch the Sturt Double Blues play host to the Glenelg Tigers, the two closest clubs to our house. I made the decision before we went that whoever won this game would be ‘our team’. But while we were watching, I had a moment of genius – ask the boy who he liked.
“Boy Z”, I said, “the blue ones are the Blues and the black ones are the Tigers. Who do we like?” Maybe an unfair question, because Boy Z knows that ‘tigers’ are fierce giant cats and ‘blue’ is just the colour of our Mazda hatchback.
“Ti-ers.”
Ti-ers it is my boy. Ti-ers it is. We’ve got ourselves a team.
We’ve been to a handful of games now and everything is now Tigers. He wants to wear his ‘Tigers’ shirt every day. We’ve hunted down ‘Tigers’ socks, although a few sizes too big. Stupid Australian sizes. He sleeps with his ‘Tigers’ football. We have endless conversations about the next time we’re going to see ‘Tigers football’. (Answer – the next time it isn’t raining on game day).
And I’m actually starting to like the game myself.
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by headbang8
04 Jun 2010 at 16:50
You’re almost there with this assimilation business. You just have to promounce Glenelg as G’nuw.
headbang8´s last blog ..Photo Friday: Family
by Gappy
04 Jun 2010 at 18:36
That looks like a rugby ball. Do you mean rugby? Because then the beating the crap out of each other and backwards passing would also make sense. I live in Wales in the u.k. Rugby is our national game, but beyond the superficial pleasure of watching a bunch of huge muddy men in shorts run around, I can’t say I really get it.
Gappy´s last blog ..Do You Ever Miss Your Old Life?
by SciFi Dad
04 Jun 2010 at 21:02
I tried watching Australian football once. Reminded me of watching football played by a bunch of stoned university students when they couldn’t find their frisbee.
SciFi Dad´s last blog ..Video Friday Returns
by Technobabe
04 Jun 2010 at 21:25
Well, it is a sport you and your boys will have in common, right? I like that you say you are getting used to it. So it is possible to teach old dogs new tricks after all? Smile. This was the first music recommendation of yours that I did not care for. Pretty good after all the many others in your posts though. Your family is growing, as in the boys getting older looking and able to do more with you. Enjoy your lovely family.
Technobabe´s last blog ..Wicked Wicked Sense Of Humor
by The Unbearable Banishment
04 Jun 2010 at 21:45
I had my first exposure to rugby about three years ago while in London. Loved it! Much more action-packed than the good ole’ NFL (commercial interruptus).
Rugby players looked like the kind of guys who use to take my lunch money away when I was in Junior High School.
The Unbearable Banishment´s last blog ..a.m. New York
by Cat
04 Jun 2010 at 23:04
My boy actually loves rugby which he played on an intramural team for three years in high school, but he’s not crazy about American football. I wonder if he’ll get into it more when he goes to Georgia in the fall. I told no matter how he feels about it, if he gets an opportunity to go to a game he must go. Maybe he will sort of take to it like you and rugby.
Cat´s last blog ..A Happy-Sad Night
by muskrat
04 Jun 2010 at 23:36
As long as he doesn’t root for Auburn or LSU, right? Right. Glad we got that worked out.
muskrat´s last blog ..help me, andrew clark. you’re my only hope.
by courtney
04 Jun 2010 at 23:51
That’s as good a reason as any to become a fan of a team. Those socks are too much!
courtney´s last blog ..Best Tweet Ever
by Papa Bradstein
05 Jun 2010 at 00:04
I struggle both with motivating to get 3B or Jewel into American football. Not that I don’t love it, but who has the time for it anymore? It’s not just that I now have two kids, but you’re right–every game is now three hours.
Personally, if I want to watch grown men stand around on a lawn for that long, I’ll go to a baseball game. The weather’s much nicer.
Papa Bradstein´s last blog ..I’m betting my face that you’ll fail…
by Jill/Twipply Skwood
05 Jun 2010 at 00:43
Well, whatever happens, he looks darn cute in that outfit!
I sometimes think I should watch tv for that same lunchtime conversation reason.
Jill/Twipply Skwood´s last blog ..Some Jews Do Fix Stuff. But not that many I gather.
by Nathan B.
05 Jun 2010 at 00:51
Black and Gold. Tigers. I like it.
And watched a bit of this on late-night TV (sorry, tele)…l kept feeling like I was watching a 1920’s American football game.
And isn’t this the sport where players are allowed to stick their digits in other player’s orifices?
by Not Afraid To Use It
05 Jun 2010 at 01:50
Love his uniform and his method of selection. Last week my two randomly decided they love Liverpool. Thank god my husband happens to be a Liverpool supporter. We’re going to have a helluva time finding shirts here Stateside, though. And the Boy’s jersey is going to be hard to top. It’s too cool!
by grumpy
05 Jun 2010 at 10:17
Go Freo Dockers! Wooo!
I am not much of a footy fan…unless husband has managed to procure us tickets in his work’s corporate suite. I can handle football when it comes with a full roast meal and champagne.
grumpy´s last blog ..Oh Dearie Me,You Dickhead!
by A Free Man
05 Jun 2010 at 11:10
Just to clarify – we’re not talking about rugby.
Rugby: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xXtm3VCQnGQ&feature=related
Footy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=invqX1wflqI
by mondraussie
05 Jun 2010 at 21:31
Aagghh!! Aussie Rules, Rugby League and cricket! Three of my all-time favourite things to hate! The sheer stupidity of running around a field after a pointy ball, and beating the crap out of each other along the way can only be topped by the mindbogglingly boring game of cricket which can be played across 4 days and end in “a draw”… why do you think i left?!
mondraussie´s last blog ..how’s that diet working out for you tubby?
by arizaphale
06 Jun 2010 at 01:31
I have got to remind you of this clip which I think I posted for your benefit a few years back now. I still think it is a great seller for our national game (which is NOT RUGBY PEOPLE)!!!!!
Whilst I cannot bring myself to listen to the never ending commentary on the radio on weekends, especially since there seems to be a version playing in every room of our house, I uphold the game as fast, spectacular and ballsy! (no bloody wussy padding here boys!). Himself assures Boy Z that the ‘Mighty Bays’ are a good choice!!
Loved that track btw!
And when does the SSG get here?
by Theresa B
06 Jun 2010 at 06:41
This is the most rational explanation I’ve ever heard for choosing a sports team. I congratulate you.
It sort of reminds me of why my mother went into the Air Force. According to her, it was because 1) it got her away from her parents, and 2) she liked the USAF uniforms better than any of the other branches. There you have. This is how to make major life decisions.
Theresa B´s last blog ..Through the Looking Glass (Literally)
by Here In Franklin
06 Jun 2010 at 07:18
That might be an Australian football Boy Z is clutching, but I know a UGA hat when I see one!
Here In Franklin´s last blog ..Adieu. Ciao. Auf wiedersehen. Adios. Ta ta.
by Jamie
07 Jun 2010 at 03:49
Well at least the boy now has some hope of escaping the ignominious fate of being a Georgia football fan. Actually, I think if you padded up those Tigers players, they would give ole UGA a good pounding – just like Vandy!
by Kevin C Jones
07 Jun 2010 at 08:58
I showed up on my first day of Australian private high school back in 1968 and the second question was “who do you barrack for?” = “which Aussie Rules team do you support”. As I say every time, I always support my local team. The Tigers, at that time.
But at 6′5″ and 200 lbs, when I played Aussie Rules I was the Ruck. The first person to challenge for the ball, where you leap in the air, try to knee your opposite ruck in sensitive areas, and knock the ball to your rover. I must have been good at it, because I retired after being concussed for the second time. I was waiting for the Mark when two forwards picked me up and slammed me against the behind post.
For kids, I would recommend micro-soccer.
by Jacob
12 Jun 2010 at 05:46
I feel the same way about baseball. I can follow the stats and the results, but I can’t sit through a pro game on TV. Now, the minor leagues is another story. I love going to minor league baseball games. There’s something missing in the big leagues that is still alive in the minors. Maybe that’s how the lower league footy is for you.
Jacob´s last blog ..More Walking in the Woods