Actually, that is all kind of crap. I am busy, that’s true. But I’ve always been able to find time at the end of my day to whip up a blog post. The bigger reason it is going to be quiet around here is that I’ve suddenly developed some paranoia about security, anonymity and privacy. Three independent events in the last month or so have given me pause to think about this whole blogging thing. I’ve begun to worry about how much of myself and, more importantly, my family I’m putting out there for any random stranger to see. The irony of me as  a blogger is that I’m actually an incredibly private person. I think that that therapeutic value of blogging for me has always been that it forces me to be more open, even if I use a pseudonym.

But right now I’m wondering if I’m too open.

Don’t know. But I’m going to have to think about things for a little while.

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I can’t remember where I got this live version of Ryan Adams’ “I See Monsters”. I suspect the Aquarium Drunkard. It’s from a live set of Adams with his Cardinals called the “Loft Sessions”. The original comes from “Love Is Hell”, an incredible pair of EPs that are available from

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The irony of me as a blogger is that I’m a fiercely private person. I do not like people to know things about me, to know what is going on in my head. I keep friends and even family (especially family) at arm’s length, plucking tidbits of information like ripe fruit for their consumption and keeping the rest at arms length. This has always been the case, since I was a child I’ve been keeping people out – going so far sometimes as to construct elaborate falsehoods to keep them off of my scent.

Privacy is precious. So, what the hell am I doing publishing my life on the internet for anyone with a phone line to read?

The answer is that A Free Man is, in large part, a fictional character – a Gatsby-esque construct of things embellished and things left unsaid. You read what I want you to read about me – the good things, the mildly amusing, the minor foibles. I still control how much of myself I reveal. The rest, I keep back. Keep to myself or a close confidant or two.

The portrait I paint is not always an accurate reflection of reality. All this handwringing is because right now, there is something going on for me and I’m not going to talk to y’all about it. I’ve struggled with what I want to say today and have made a big damn mess of this post. This post was originally published in a different form, a form that gave some folks cause for concern.  I clearly misunderestimated the impact of a post like this. I guess one can’t pop up, say “Here I am, look at me!”, followed immediately by “Leave me alone, don’t ask me questions. Everything is fine. Really.”

So what to do?  I don’t know. I think I may go over to my pseudonymous corner of the internet and be quiet for a little while.

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Elliott Smith’s “XO” is available from .